You want to know the worst feeling in the world for an NFL coach, fan or owner? It’s that churn in the pit of your stomach when a team’s backup quarterback trots out onto the field.
There’s no way in a usual franchise scenario for a team’s season to proceed as normal if a backup takes the field. If that happens, it’s usually because the guy on the bench should have been starting in the first place and the dude ahead of him was too entrenched. Still, with the number of quarterbacks who at least miss a couple of games a year, a team must invest in their back up situation.
Here are the squads that didn’t.
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
Starter: Tom Brady
Backups: Brian Hoyer, Danny Etling
You want to talk about a nightmare? With Tom Brady spending the Patriots Organized Team Activities tossing footballs off yachts, New England fans are getting a good, solid look at it as Brian Hoyer takes all the snaps with the first-team offense. It’s like replacing Luke Skywalker with Jar Jar Binks.
Brady is about to turn 41 and there’s no amount of almond milk and kale smoothies that can chase off father time forever. Etling barely passed the ball in his time with LSU and looks like he was picked in the seventh round just to get a third quarterback on the roster.
As much shit as Brady got in trying to get Jimmy Garoppolo out of the building, there was no way to keep the two men on the same team. The issue wasn’t the trade, either Brady or Jimmy G had to go, but with the fact that the Pats made no effort this offseason to add anybody. Even though they had a chance at Lamar Jackson and multiple shots at Mason Rudolph.
HOUSTON TEXANS
Starter: Deshaun Watson
Backups: Brandon Weedon, Joe Webb, Stephen Morris
Unlike the Patriots, it’s understandable why the Texans wouldn’t spring any real money or draft capital on a backup. Watson played in seven games last season and started six before tearing up his knee and was one of the most dynamic players in the NFL. He completed 61.8 percent of his passes for 19 touchdowns and eight interceptions and added 269 yards and two touchdowns on the ground.
He caused draft scouts (other than me) to completely reevaluate their quarterback ranking criteria (Which Dak Prescott should have done the year before) and got Baker Mayfield taken first overall this year. The Texans are now building an offense that utilizes the entirety of Watson’s skillset and, make no mistake, it will look like a complete shitstorm the minute Brandon Weedon is forced to take the field.
CAROLINA PANTHERS
Starter: Cam Newton
Backups: Garrett Gilbert, Taylor Heinicke, Kyle Allen
The Texans might be able to get away with their backup situation, but the Panthers are in real trouble. Newton, because of the way he plays the game, is a constant concussion waiting to happen. With Derek Anderson coming off the bench, the team was OK, but they let him hit the bricks.
Gilbert and Heinicke have never thrown a single pass in the NFL and Allen is a rookie undrafted free agent. If there’s a team out there that should really be calling Colin Kaepernick, it’s Carolina.
NEW ORLEANS SAINTS
Starter: Drew Brees
Backups: Tom Savage, Taysom Hill, J.T. Barrett
The Saints are a lot like the Patriots in that they really like playing with fire. Luckily for them, Brees has been healthy and played through the roof for years, but God knows how long that’s going to last. At least New England made an attempt to prepare for the future with Jimmy Garoppolo a few seasons ago, but the Saints haven’t done anything. It’s Brees or nothing.
Barrett was a great pick up as a UDFA, but he’s going to need at least a year to learn how to run a semblance of a pro offense. Savage? I can only point you to his dumpster fire starts in Houston last season. Hill has never tossed an NFL pass and only suited up for five games last season.
